The other day I caught one of my children in a bold face lie and it just broke my heart.

Once caught he apologized over and over and a piece of me really just wanted to let it go, to offer grace, to say “do better next time,” only I knew that the result of that would just be a future lie followed by a bunch of apologies, because kids don’t get the subtle nuance of grace. 

Our family has been through quite a bit the past few months and because I feel guilty I have painted every disobedience and sin of my children with a big old GRACE brush and it has come back around to biting me in the rear.  I am learning that sometimes a lesson is only learned through the pain of consequence, and we need to remember that the consequence of sin is always death and death stings. 

Christ died so that we might be forgiven for our sins, and live in eternity with God the Father. This does not mean that He delivers us from all earthly consequences of our sin because it is the sting of discipline that creates a memory keeping us from repeating the same mistakes and sins over again. 

Hebrews 2:10-12 says:

But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.

So take a new grip with your tired hands and strengthen your weak knees. Mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who are weak and lame will not fall but become strong.”
After I read this verse the other day {and I highly recommend reading ALL of Hebrews 12 because it is full of mama gems} I woke up.  

My kids need me to give them consequences, to allow them to experience the pain of punishment in the safety of our home, under the love of their mama, so that they learn how to live right.  My kids need a memory of the pain that follows sin so that their future choices bring them life and joy.  There is absolutely a time and place for grace, but there is also an absolute need for consequence and I for one am still learning to find the balance.

Are you good at following through with consequences?  What would be some of your best advice??  Did this post resonate with some struggles you have as a mama??

Amber Newberry is the founder of Beautiful & Beloved a ministry dedicated to freedom and empowerment.  Amber had 4 littles ages 8-3 and lives in the mountains of southern Colorado, she enjoys speaking to groups all over about what it means to live believing that you are Beautiful & Beloved.


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